The Time Jesus Left the 99
to Bring Me Home. A Warning of Deceptive Philosophies
“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” Ephesians 6:12
We’re engaged in warfare, friends. Whether we realize it or not, it’s real.
As I discovered, it often doesn’t even look like or feel like war because it takes place in the spiritual realm. In many ways, it’s subtle, even quiet—silently creeping in through the back door while your guard is down. The objective? To separate us from the peace we have in Christ, from enjoying fellowship with Him, to stunt our spiritual growth and hinder the Kingdom work God has called us to.
Scripture warns us that the devil masquerades as an “angel of light,” and while he knows he cannot extinguish our eternal life, he’ll do everything he can to “steal, destroy, and kill” things in this life. Paul warns, “Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. Therefore, it is not surprising if his servants also disguise themselves as servants of righteousness…” (2 Cor 11:14-15) Beneath his apparent beauty and alluring temptations, Satan and his demons are “like whitewashed tombs—beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead men’s bones and all sorts of impurity.” (Matthew 23:27)
The story of David’s anointing in 1 Samuel 16 is an example of how easily we can be drawn in by outer appearances. The prophet Samuel sized up David’s oldest brother and assumed he was looking at Israel’s next king. The Lord, however, corrected his misguided thinking: “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” Like the Sirens in Homer’s Odyssey or Aragorn in Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings, one must look beneath the surface to accurately judge which is truly gold.
Paul knew the dangers of darkness. He knew it threatened to deceive Christ’s lambs. He knew how easily we can be swayed by “fine sounding arguments” and warns us in Colossians 2, “See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy...” He warns his fellow Christians of “wolves” who do the work of Satan in Acts 20, “I know that after I leave, savage wolves will come in among you and will not spare the flock. Even from your own number men will arise and distort the truth in order to draw away disciples after them. So be on your guard!” And in his letter to the Ephesians, Paul implores us to “put on the full armor of God so that [we] can take [our] stand against the devil’s schemes.”
The battleground for many of Satan’s attacks is our very minds. Paul speaks of this concern for the Corinthians when he told them: “I am afraid that, as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, your minds will be led astray from the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ” (2 Cor 11:3).
Charles Ryrie, considered one of the greatest theologians of the 20th century, says this of Satan:
“By his very longevity Satan has acquired a breadth and depth of experience which he matches against the limited knowledge of man. He has observed other believers in every conceivable situation, thus enabling him to predict with accuracy how we will respond to circumstances. Although Satan is not omniscient, his wide experience and observation of man throughout his entire history on earth give him knowledge which is far superior to anything any man could have.”
Peter knew, too, the importance of being watchful and on guard against Satan. As Jesus’ disciple, Peter heard from his master’s lips, “Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat.” Later, after Christ’s resurrection and ascension, Peter described the devil as one who “prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” He tells us to therefore “be self-controlled and alert” and to “resist him.”
Satan will use anything to entice us away from our devotion to Christ. He can use even good things like family, friends, a career, an education, entertainment, and prosperity as tools to draw us farther from Jesus.
For me, he used my desire for knowledge to lure me farther from Christ. It was the same way he tempted our first mother, Eve: “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil. When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.”
Unbeknownst to me at the time, my mind had become a spiritual battleground.
My Shame Became Christ’s Victory
This past December, I was asked to share a testimony with my Community Bible Study class about a time Jesus called me to follow Him. I asked God to bring to my mind what He would like me to share because there have been many times He has called me away from following the world throughout my life. Well, the idea that came to mind immediately made me feel ashamed and say That, Lord? Really?
That’s one way the devil steals our peace. He’s called the accuser for a reason. He loves to remind us of our sin. All the ways we’ve messed up and fallen short. All the reasons we don’t deserve God’s love or forgiveness.
But no other ideas came, so I thought if that is His will, then I will share it. Knowing my heart needed a reminder of the Gospel, He showed me a short note written by Christian writer, Grant Herbel that gave me courage:
“I have no problem talking about who I was before I accepted the Gospel. The old me is dead and buried! I am a new creation. Even my greatest shame is now only an example of Jesus’ victory in my life.” -Grant Herbel
That really encouraged me –and I hope it encourages you too—to remember that Jesus isn’t just Lord of our present or future, He’s Lord of our past. And when He calls us out of darkness, He claims victory over it. (Amen!)
Setting the Stage
The spring before Rich and I got married I had decided to resign from my teaching job. And three long years later, we finally welcomed baby Andrew. In those three years of waiting, I became very lost and perhaps even depressed. I didn’t know who I was. My identity had really become wrapped up in my job. At one point Rich had even confided that he was worried we wouldn’t have anything to talk about once I left teaching because it was ALL I ever talked about!
During those three years I lost touch with my colleagues—including the ones I was closest to. We attended church, but it was a very small congregation made up of mostly older people our parents’ and grandparents’ age. The few neighbors we had kept to themselves and were rarely seen. So, outside of my mom and sister, who live 30 and 45 minutes away, I really had no girlfriends.
It’s only in hindsight that I realize just how spiritually starved I was.
I’ve always been athletic, so when Andrew was about a year old, I began searching online for in-person fitness groups. And I found one—just a 10-minute drive away—a yoga studio. I registered for one of the beginner yoga classes and went. It felt so good to be exercising again and to be with other people who also enjoyed exercise.
I began taking more classes and more classes until I was there six times a week. I made some friends and felt accepted, but I knew from early on that no one there was Christian—at least none that I could tell. I tried not to let it bother me because it felt so nice to have friends and see faces light up when I walked through the door, but I always sensed I really didn’t belong.
(Which had been the story of my life—always trying to fit in with people who really did not love me or want to know me in a deep sense.)
“Desirable for Gaining Wisdom”
As well as loving to exercise, I also love to learn as I mentioned above. Exercising and learning are examples of good things that Satan used to entice me away from Jesus. The teacher in me craves knowing things and loves to share what I know with others. The pride in me, however, loves to receive recognition for all that I know and being sought out as an “expert.” This tendency toward pride and the environment I was in nearly every day for 5 years made for a dangerous combination.
I started learning everything I could about yoga—its origins, the Sanskrit language, and what they call “the eight limbs.” One of the things I noticed lacking at the studio I attended was meditation, so I decided I would become the resident meditation expert.
I read books, took workshops, attended retreats…I dove in traveling to West Virginia, New York, and Virginia to learn from top teachers, most of whom were Buddhists.
I kept telling myself it was OK, because in my heart I loved Jesus. But it really wasn’t OK.
Eventually, I applied to and was accepted into an intensive year long program to become a certified meditation teacher. Most of it could be completed online, but a portion needed to be done in person, which required one to travel to Massachusetts—which meant I would have to fly.
He Called for His Lost Lamb
The idea of flying unnerved me, but I was determined. As the deadline drew near for me to book my flight, however, I was overcome with anxiety. I was driving home from somewhere thinking about airports when I began crying and shaking so badly I had to pull over. I automatically assumed it was just my nerves about flying, but as I sat there trying to calm down, I began to realize I was not to go on this trip, and I was not to participate in this program. I believe the Holy Spirit can give our souls either peace or disquiet to inform our decisions depending on His will for us. He was definitely telling me of His disapproval.
I felt embarrassed and guilty for quitting. I had already paid the tuition (which was a hefty sum) and told my friends at the studio about the program. The owner had even talked to me about teaching classes for her once I graduated.
But as I sat with God in prayer over it (mostly being quiet and still and actually listening for once), I began to sense that it wasn’t just the meditation program He didn’t want me to attend—He was calling me to stop attending classes at the yoga studio too. I was to walk away from it completely.
Which I did.
I thought about the friends I had made and that I hadn’t even said goodbye, but the Lord’s call to me was so strong and so clear, nothing else seemed very important.
I experienced a period of grief—it felt like a death. I grieved over the loss of my friends. I grieved that they did not know the Lord and perhaps never would. I grieved that I had wasted so much time studying and pursuing something that greatly displeased God. I grieved over my foolish pride that thought I could safely dance between two worlds.
And then, as if it wasn’t enough that He came looking for His lost sheep and brought her home, He also saw fit to pour out blessings on me by opening many doors leading to profound spiritual growth.
I had been invited to MOPS (a Christian ministry for mothers of preschoolers) by a total stranger at a playground the summer our youngest child was born. During my first year at MOPS, God called my family to a new church—one with many other young families like ours. One with strong emphasis on discipleship and Christ-centered teaching. Our spiritually starved souls received true nourishment. Soon after we started attending this new church, my husband and I were invited to join a small group at our pastor’s home to study Galatians. And through a friend I had made at MOPS, I had heard about and registered for Community Bible Study (CBS).
The first year I attended CBS we studied Acts. What an amazing book!
For so much of my life, I sought knowledge and wisdom from every source but God. I remember marveling over God’s word thinking—it’s all here. I don’t need to discover some “secret” knowledge! Everything you could ever want to know about navigating life well is right here. He’s not keeping the mysteries of life locked away somewhere in the philosophies of worldly men; they are found in Christ!
Paul prayed that all those in Christ would find this supreme treasure:
“…that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.” Colossians 2:2-3
He is Worth the Cost
One story in Acts that made a big impact on me was when Paul was in Ephesus. In Chapter 19, we read “Many of those who believed now came and openly confessed their evil deeds. A number who had practiced sorcery brought their scrolls together and burned them publicly. When they calculated the value of the scrolls, the total came to 50,000 drachmas.” My study Bible notes a drachma to be worth about a day’s wages, so that was A LOT of money.
After I had read those verses the first time for CBS, I realized that I still owned all my yoga and meditation books, plus other books I had on astrology and even palmistry. I wasn’t reading them anymore, but I still had them. I went downstairs to our bookshelves, gathered them up, and threw them into the garbage.
In this way, I join Paul who says “I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ, and be found in Him.”
Blessings on top of Blessings
Two years later, I received a text from one of the teachers I had befriended at the yoga studio. I hadn’t seen or spoken with anyone since I left. I hadn’t reached out to anyone, and no one had reached out to me. But one day, this woman sent me a text asking to meet for coffee. She wanted to ask me some things as “a sister in Christ.”
This both surprised and excited me, so I agreed.
She wanted to know if I stopped going to yoga because I was a Christian. I told her Yes. She then told me that she had recently been baptized and was feeling a sense that she needed to leave too. She told me that my example filled her with courage and that she would resign from her teaching position that very week!
I cried the entire way home praising God for not only forgiving me, but for blessing me with a new community filled with godly friends who point me to Jesus again and again and for using me to draw another away from the pagan world and closer to Him.
Well said. Amen!
Very touching! I pray your open confession encourages others! I, too, was dabbling in "secret" knowledge that the Lord called me away from. I, too, threw away all my books. The Lord has blessed me with unimaginable happiness, joy, and peace! You are right, Vanessa, all the knowledge we could ever want to gain is in His Holy Word! Amen.